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An Autobiography

Hey. Hi. Hello. I think a good starting point on this journey is to introduce myself. I'm Joyce. I grew up in Clovis, California. Most people haven't heard of Clovis unless you've done your research or have driven through on accident. I haven't lived in California for 16 years and am surprised every year I go back and visit. Fruit tree orchards have slowly disappeared and the country is slowly disappearing as more houses and schools are being built.

Ethnic and Cultural Heritage

My membership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints overshadowed learning anything past the surface things of my genetic makeup. Growing up in a community where three-quarters of the population was white, it was hard to identify with any one group. Yes, the Church where I grew up was primarily white. We had small Spanish or Hmong branches sprinkled throughout the valley, but the vast majority of the people I went to church with were white. This cultural heritage has played a major role in my life. Beliefs aside the majority of how I spent my time all pointed to the fact that I was Mormon growing up. In high school I did four years of early morning seminary. We did humanitarian service through a Church owned vineyard and harvested and dried grapes to send to the needy around the world. We assembled hygiene packs, school packs, quilts, donated our time to serve meals at the homeless shelter. Now that I live in Utah, it’s harder to stick out as a member of the Church because there are just so many of us in a concentrated area so my cultural heritage isn’t what it used to be and I'm having a hard time redefining that aspect of my life.
I am half Mexican and a quarter Hawaiian and Japanese. My parents didn’t raise my siblings and me in any particular culture; our culture mainly stemmed from the Church and our ethnic heritage was always in the background. I guess it was hard for my parents to choose what sort of mix of ethnic heritage was going to be prominent in my life. Before my mom passed away 20 years ago, I would cook Mexican dishes with her. Part of the Mexican culture, the women do most of the cooking and household chores. My dad taught my siblings and I to not be afraid of hard work and the meaning of aloha is meant to be shared with everyone. Part of who I am comes from what I’ve learned about my ancestors. There’s a line in Mulan where she is getting ready for the match-maker and she sings: “Bring honor to my family.” My ethnic culture can be whittled down to that one line: bring honor to my family. I don’t have to choose which ethnicity I bring honor to, I just have to live a good life. 
Family Structure I am the third of five children in my family. The oldest daughter. The middle child. The quiet one. I was usually the one that wanted to stay home or go to the farmer’s market with my mom on a Friday night. I was the homebody. My mom came into my room one night after my two older brothers had a loud and physical argument and said, “I am so glad that she is a good child.” She didn’t know I was still awake with knots in my stomach listening to my brothers argue. Part of that played into how I perceived myself as a child. I was painfully shy and very quiet. On multiple report cards in elementary school and jr. high, my teachers would say that I needed to work on talking louder and have more opportunities to gain confidence in myself. Today, I am still in the background but I have learned that my voice and opinions matter. I am an introvert by nature so making sure my voice is heard is sometimes difficult for me but it’s something that I have realized that I need to consciously work on. 
After my mom passed away, my family structure changed dramatically a couple of times. My dad remarried a woman with three children from previous marriages. A year later they had my half brother. Their marriage was tumultuous at best. My older siblings and I didn't know where we fit in and my younger siblings hated being there. They eventually divorced. Five years later they remarried only to divorce, again, a few years later. Now that my dad knows where my siblings and I stand on being in a romantic relationship with his ex-wife, I think it's safe to say that any surprise weddings won't be happening ever again. Socioeconomic History I am definitely a product of my parent’s upbringing. Both grew up in East Los Angeles with parents who had to scrimp and scrape. As a child, I was acutely aware that we didn’t have a lot of money as a family which lead to me not asking for a lot of material items. I knew that my basic needs would be met, but I was also very aware that those material extras would have to be worked for. I knew that I would have to go to work with my mom and help her clean houses to earn any sort of money to go out with my friends. As an adult, the sudden appearance of a paycheck was like gold to me. I got into a bad habit of spending more than I had. I learned the hard way that I needed to save for things like bills and rent and food and then put the rest in a savings account. Moderating my want for the extra material things in life has always been something that I struggle with. I also know the value - and thrill - of saving up for a fun trip or buying my first car. 

Gender
I think if I had been raised any other way, I think my views on gender would be different. As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I grew up believing that women weren't able to be the head of a household if there wasn't a husband in the picture. I feel like women were supposed to be subservient in a way and default to her husband or father if decisions needed to be made. On the flip side, I know that my mom was in charge of the finances. I know that my parents were equal partners in making decisions. My siblings and I were all expected to maintain high standards in all aspects of our lives.

I know this has been a long post so far, but the four main aspects: ethnic and cultural heritage, specific family structure, socioeconomic history and gender all add to the diversity and strengths in a family structure and cultural context. Some facets are more present than others, but they all go hand in hand.

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